My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
