Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Randomize
