He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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