he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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