What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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