If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize