i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
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