I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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