Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
