Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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