worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
