It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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