you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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