no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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