Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
