Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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