Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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