Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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