is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...