Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Randomize
