I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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