He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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