Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
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he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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