doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Randomize
