So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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