is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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