Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
