so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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