Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
