it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
That was before I lit my hair on fire
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize