I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
