covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
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I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
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I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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