dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
You're like the curious george of whores
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
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