no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I am mentally ready for anal.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
