i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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