Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize
