Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize