The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
