Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
