So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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