Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize