I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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