Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize