do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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