I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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