Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
