took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
