4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
