Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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