gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
